How are you really?

We miss when Christmas meant everyone sleeping under our roof. The noise, the anticipation, knowing everyone was home. We didn’t know how precious that was.

Now our children are grown, building lives and traditions of their own. Our daughter and grandchildren are in St. Catharines. Our son and daughter move into a new home at the end of November. Our daughter in BC won’t be home for Christmas. Coleen’s brother is in long-term care. We find ourselves wishing we could gather everyone close, the way we once did.

A little honesty: we’re happy for the lives our children are building, and we still miss having them all around the table. Both things are true.

There are other families to consider, competing commitments and only so many hours. A good plan will involve compromise, and love shouldn’t feel like another obligation.

So perhaps Christmas Eve brunch becomes a new tradition. Perhaps we invite someone who has no family nearby. Perhaps we take a walk, make that visit, or linger over coffee instead of watching the clock.

We can’t recreate those old Christmases. But we can pay attention to the people in front of us, and make time for those we’re missing.

This winter, we’re trying to put less pressure on the gatherings and more care into the connections. To leave room for laughter, fellowship and an honest answer when we ask, ‘How are you, really?’

And then stay long enough to listen.

Warmly,
Craig & Coleen